Snork

stopped at a bar for a of lunch. After work I stopped back. The same lovely woman was tending bar.

I said I missed you.
She said "I missed you back"

I replied; "How come woman never miss my front?"
 
SO... what have y'all been workin' on?

rc
 

Attachments

  • sno.jpg
    sno.jpg
    32.9 KB · Views: 140
To snork, or not to snork?
That might be the question.
HbdD!
rc

...I'd better give credit to Burning Man for the photo of their event.
 

Attachments

  • bbtvm.jpg
    bbtvm.jpg
    29.2 KB · Views: 129
Last edited:
rustycase said:
To snork, or not to snork?
That might be the question.
HbdD!
rc

...I'd better give credit to Burning Man for the photo of their event.
Click to expand...

LOL Rusty and my most sincere apologies to the bard....

To snork or not to snork. That is the question. Whether it is nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune. Or to bare arms! And snork!

"I plyth thee trooth and say thie should snork!"
 
Heard this on the radio yesterday;

Muhammad Ali Said to an airline attendant ( Back then, a stewardess) when asked to fasten his seat belt.

"Superman don`t need no seat belt"

To which she replied; "Superman don`t need no airplane. Buckle up"


Cracked me up. Ya just know her kids did well.
 
lol
That's a good one...
I've known a number of stewardesses, they were all attractive, assertive, and quite logical.
...and what a great boxer he was!
rc
usflg
 
I thought it went ( from Monty Python ) Adolf: My dog has no nose! The Nuremburg crowd as one: HOW DOES HE SMELL??? Adolf: Awful...lafflaff
 
That is the correct form, the pleasure is in dismantling the worn out joke.

"My wife went to Indonesia"

"Jakarta?"

"No, Bandung." instead of "No, she went on her own."
 
As a teenager I was a smarta$$ (which is nothing uncommon). When my great aunt, Jeanette, went on vacation she was gone for a while. We visited once she got back, so I asked her:
Me - "Where did you go?"
Jeanette - "Juneau, Alaska."
Me - "I know a bit about Alaska. Where'd you go?"
Jeanette - "North, Snicklefritz. I went north."
 
At a social gathering, I was asked “What do you do, Dan?”

I replied; “Arch Nemesis”. I started out as a minion. (No academe) From there, I worked my way up to “Henchman” 23rd out of 23. If you watch a movie where the hero runs, I am one of the guys shooting at his feet.

I then worked my way up to #2.. Just one place and second only to the Villon.

Still with out any formal education, I passed the exams and became a minor Villon.

From there, I became a supper Villon. (and this is unheard of for an evil graduate) a nemesis.

After receiving my life time achievement award for evil, I was automatically promoted to “ Arch Nemesis” Pretty much A PHD of evil.





Dead, dead silence.....


Then a woman laughs, almost spitting her wine. The circle brakes into giggles and her husband backhands me in the upper arm and says;

“Ya could'a just said you were a lawyer”
 
I was having sex, wild, frenzied uncontrolled sex, and I started shouting words, you know, Words, to my wife. Mobile phones are so handy, aren't they?
 
Caught **** for this one once:

When I worked nightwatch at a drugstore in Cleveland, there was one cashier who was very knowledgeable, experienced, as well as harsh, humourless, and a bit stuck up. And was not apologetic about it at all. We generally weathered things with her as best we could. One evening she was going around behind the registers making a racket while searching for something. One of the others asked her what she was looking for.
She stated she was trying to find "her" broom that somebody must have borrowed and not returned.
I turned to the next nearest cashier and said in a low voice "She must be hoping to log some frequent-flier miles."

I could see by the look in her eyes that it took a moment to sink in, then she burst out laughing. The older cashier caught on that something was said, and deduced that it was likely about her. But oh man, I'm so mean sometimes.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top