SMASH! or 'Never Let ANYONE Ride Yer Bike'

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BarelyAWake

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Jul 21, 2009
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I'm actually a possessive, cranky ol' bastid. I never watched 'Sesame Street' and I'm not big on sharing...

Yet sometimes I mess up :(

A friend of mine is a gearhead and performance engine tech, he's also one of the few folks I'm good friends with. So once I got my MB all dialed in and running great - I figured of all people he would not only appreciate it, but also know how to treat my baby. There is no other way to truly appreciate one of these creations than to ride it. While many are glamor girls, mine is built with a more utilitarian and performance outlook, I don't much care for looks alone.

So after what seemed to be an eternity of twiddling, tweaking, futzing, and fine tuning my MB slowly evolved into everything I hoped for and more. Ironically enough, just this week I found myself sitting on my milkcrate in the predawn silence staring at my bike and wondering what to do with it. Every morning before my daily commute I set aside a couple of hours to fix and upgrade my bike - yet I had just run out of things to work on, so lacking anything else I had resorted to the basics of maintenance, oiling and lubing chain and cables and basically messing around with cosmetics.

Yeah... well, now I've quite a bit to occupy my morning routine.

As I was pulling into my driveway yesterday after work, I spotted my friend standing next to his car. I pulled up and we chatted engine talk for a while, as he hadn't ridden it except the one lap around the parking lot back when it was still running like crap - he wanted to see what it was like in it's current incarnation. As I had done MUCH to improve performance, the latest of which was SBP's expansion chamber - after some thought I said ok.

Oops.

Pacing about like a expectant father, I wondered why it was taking soooo long for him to return. I told myself to shush, that I was just nervous, that I had asked him to stop at the store to grab me the pack of smokes I had forgotten and to remember the people there that always crowded around with their questions. He was probably just having a blast.

Nope, he wasn't having much fun at all.

I looked up and sure enough my worst fears were realized, I could just see him in the distance - dragging my wonderful toy by it's front wheel. For just a moment I hated him a bit, then I walked out to meet him, to see if he was ok and to see how bad my bike had suffered.

As I walked, I thought about all the things I might have done wrong, what might have failed and caused my friend to crash. I worried about the rear rim as it did need truing, I thought about the engine and exhaust mounts, I fretted about the frame's integrity, I suspected he may have gotten hit by a car.

None of the above, he had simply lost it taking a turn way too fast.

He was fine, a little worse for wear with a touch of road rash on one elbow and a bruise on his leg. My bike however wasn't quite as lucky. The front rim trashed, the pedals and crank bent and loose, front brakes wasted, the forks just a touch tweaked, both shifters gouged to heck and bent, and various other scratches and dings. Judging from the damage and his tale of woe - the front had gone out from under him (most likely sand while turning and braking aggressively) and the bike had cartwheeled.

Yet there was much to be learned from this and all is not lost. My friend being as awesome as he is immediately offered to buy the bike complete (he likes it despite his misfortune), or a new replacement bike w/o engine so I can cannibalize it for parts (cheaper by far than just the parts themselves), or last but not least my suggestion of a slightly different bike so I can upgrade the rims and have disk brakes (same price anyway).

Happily, this is not an expensive proposition. From even the early planning stage I had considered this to be a prototype - the bike itself had only been a two hundred dollar investment, less than half of his paycheck anyway. So I'm off to get another bike today, not the new one for the Grubee I've sitting on a shelf for my winter project like I hoped, but just a donor bike to get this one back up and running.

meh...

An upshot, the "silver lining" so to speak is this was a chance to see how well my McGuyverisms had stood up to this test-to-destruction. I had been forced to do the "bolt through the Dtube" method in spite of my integrity concerns, I had cobbled together an exhaust mount for my SBP expansion chamber using just hose clamps and rubber tubing, and of course there was about a million cable ties all over the place.

Not a single thing I had built or added to the bike had failed or was even damaged in any way, even my hose clamps and tubing mounts for my exhaust hadn't budged a fraction - even though the bike had obviously gone end over end. THAT knowledge alone is almost worth it.

So my advice to you is DO NOT LET ANYONE RIDE YOUR CREATION! Even though my friend is older and not prone to abusing other people's possessions, despite the fact that he understands machines, homebuilds and their oddities, these bikes are in fact very unusual and potentially dangerous and tend to be underestimated by those whom haven't ridden them before.

I'm just glad he wasn't seriously hurt.

So, here are some pics for those morbidly interested in forensics like I am and another pic of my... interesting method of mounting SBP's expansion exhaust. As many here have a similar setup - I figured you might be interested in a low cost mount technique that apparently can withstand being cartwheeled at about 30mph ;)

Well if you'll excuse me, I've quite a bit of work to attend to :( I'll be back on the road soon enough...
 

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Bikeguy Joe

Godfather of Motorized Bicycles
Jan 8, 2008
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Ouchy....not exactly the best form of empirical testing.

I am glad you friend is O.K. I know how he feels having balled up a buddies brand new Honda CB in 1978. Neither I or the bike took it very well. My friend, and the hospital let me pay off the repairs for the next 6 months.
 

xlite

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Jun 18, 2009
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Sorry for the mishap. I know how it feels having had 2 bikes demolished by buddies. My policy is if I talked them into it then wouldn't expect them to compensate for damage. As it happens both times did not require compensation. :)

Note to self: stop talking buddies into test riding my new motor installs.
 

Kevlarr

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Jul 22, 2009
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Mi
Ironically enough, just this week I found myself sitting on my milkcrate in the predawn silence staring at my bike and wondering what to do with it. Every morning before my daily commute I set aside a couple of hours to fix and upgrade my bike - yet I had just run out of things to work on, so lacking anything else I had resorted to the basics of maintenance, oiling and lubing chain and cables and basically messing around with cosmetics.
Something I've learned over the years is just when you think you're finally finished with a project fate is going to jump in and have her way with you.

Which is why I never finish anything and if I ever accidentally finish a project I hurry up and sell it before the inevitable happens.
 

BarelyAWake

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Jul 21, 2009
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Thanks for the "pat on the back" guys, I figured y'all could sympathize lol

Just got back from the dreaded, evil WallyWorld with the donor bike and now that I have the parts I'm feelin' better, o'course I still hafta fix the bdang thing. One of the few charms about these cheaper new bikes is should you need parts - just get another and gut it.

If chosen carefully and ignoring the cheapest ones these bikes can be of quite acceptable quality really, I've been continuously surprised at how well it's put up with my abuses. This latest event really showed how well the frame is made despite being alloy, drilled, and a twenty pound vibrating hammer bolted to it. o_O

I tell ya what though, the new bike looks freakin' odd without a motor in it... mebbe that's jus me :D



Kevlarr - Murphy is the one true god, yer right - I fear him yet forgot to make sacrifice. I stand humbled v.v

xlite - buddies make fine labrats, good to keep a few around - this adventure didn't hurt me a bit

bandito - *doffs hat and stands for a moment of silence*

Joe - no funny fer you cause I owned two 1978 Honda CBs, a CB750 and a CB350, I had a CB350/4 as well and loved it... I jus can't manage to remember what year that one was made due to my doddering years... '76 mebbe? What great bikes, dang yer eyes fer killin' one o.o :p Do ya remember what size it was?
 

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Salty Gator

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Aug 3, 2009
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Barely,
Crash Test Dummies are a good way to learn.....( said with a smile ).....am glad your friend isn't too banged up....he was having WAY too much fun on it and I'm sure he was chagrined to dump your bike.....however that's how we become veterans of the psychic wars.....


Laters,
Saltybrnot
 

Kevlarr

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Jul 22, 2009
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I had a CB350/4 as well and loved it... I jus can't manage to remember what year that one was made due to my doddering years... '76 mebbe?
You too??!!!!! I had a '76 CB 350-4. Coolest thing was the day (back in '84 or '85) I pulled into the neighborhood gas station and there was a guy with a CB-550-4, we started chatting a bit about the bikes and another guy with a CB-750-4 pulls in. None of us knew each other before then.
 

BarelyAWake

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Jul 21, 2009
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Yeah man, there was a million of those CBs it seems! Not a surprise really as they were truly an incredibly reliable bike and despite being heavy as **** still quite competitive - even against newer bikes.

The baby 4s were just awesome, tho I wonder how many donated their important bits to psychotic go-carts?

I might be guilty of that myself... I DENY EVERYTHING!
 

Salty Gator

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Aug 3, 2009
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Barely,
Crash Test Dummies are a good way to learn.....( said with a smile ).....am glad your friend isn't too banged up....he was having WAY too much fun on it and I'm sure he was chagrined to dump your bike.....however that's how we become veterans of the psychic wars.....


Laters,
Saltybrnot
 

BarelyAWake

New Member
Jul 21, 2009
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Yer messing w/me brainz Salty... I think I've seen that bfore somewheres...

Psychic veterans aren't to be trusted o.o


:p
 

NickDK

New Member
Aug 24, 2008
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I let a buddy of mine drive my spare bike a couple of times...big mistake! Even after clearly explaining how to use it and how to protect the precious two-stroke he came back after just two 3 mile trips and the engine was shot. It will barely stay running and it wont push past 10 MPH. I had the same bike up to 33 not long before. I am quite sure the cylinder walls are thrashed. I plan on performing an autopsy next week.

Given this experience I have adopted a new philosophy:

If you haven't spilt blood, sweat, and tears building a MB as I have, then you will never ride mine!
 

Salty Gator

New Member
Aug 3, 2009
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Yer messing w/me brainz Salty... I think I've seen that bfore somewheres...

Psychic veterans aren't to be trusted o.o


:p
..

It's an old * Jethro Tull * song.....* Veterans of the Psychic Wars *....I just thought it pertained quite well to the thread !.....LOL...


Laters,
Saltybrnot
 

Bikeguy Joe

Godfather of Motorized Bicycles
Jan 8, 2008
11,837
252
63
up north now
The Honda I tried to kill was a 1977 CB 360 fresh off the showroom floor (I think it had a couple hundred miles on it). We were drinking and he said "Sure, take it fer a ride....go down through ****'s Hollow and then turn around a crank 'er up coming down the long straight."

I did... The curves came up a little faster than I thought they should have and I never made the first one. At least it was repairable and we remained friends.

I did manage to kill another fast appreciating classic- a '71 Suzuki Titan and broke three vertibrea in my neck doing it.
Yes I still get on "those damned things".
 

BarelyAWake

New Member
Jul 21, 2009
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Glad to hear it all worked out Joe, I miss my CBs sometimes - I went all over the country w/the 750 and managed not to get killed in Philly with the 350s :D

It's interesting, I forgot just how easy bike repair was. Spending all my time on modifying this one, trying to cram an engine that didn't fit into a frame not designed for such things - I had only done the basics of maintenance to the bike itself. It must be going on fifteen to twenty years since I did any serious repairs to a bicycle.

The only annoying bit was the various cables, as of course all the controls needed to be replaced as he had wiped out my handlebars. My derailleurs are still a bit... confused, hearing voices - they randomly shift to whatever gear they find momentarily interesting, loosing interest they then pick another o_O

meh - I had just gotten that sorted with the old setup lol

Well - if nothing else this provided an opportunity to repack all my bearings with a quality marine grease, all new cables freshly lubed and a pile of spare parts too. ;)

As I have a spare rear wheel now, I'm gonna order the 36t sprocket and adapter, I didn't want to go through all the fuss and bother of swapping out the old one on the off chance I might like the 36 better, I really am quite happy with the 44 - this way I can do it the "easy" way yet still revert should it prove unsatisfying.

There's nothing like having everything you need for a repair right on hand lol;


I even managed to gain another 1mph from somewhere - I like to think it's cause my bike likes me, but it's prolly just the grease heh