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Old 01-30-2014, 02:20 AM
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Intrepid Wheelwoman Intrepid Wheelwoman is offline
Motorized Bicycle Elite Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Hauraki District, New Zealand
Posts: 2,835
Default Re: ignorant drivers thread !!!!

I am quite annoyed. I was cycling in the cool of the evening to go to the supermarket to purchase more green tea when a disorderly looking young man drove by me at a deliberately slow pace. He passed so close to me that my skirt brushed the side of his motor car and when he was directly alongside me he loudly sounded his horn. Plainly he hoped that he might cause sufficient alarm that I might take fright and fall from my bicycle. However I am of sterner stuff than that and did not so much as flinch.

With laughter frothing from his lips he accelerated ahead of me leaving me to call out aloud, 'You cad sir!' in his wake. And then without so much as a dismount I drew out my trusty Lefaucheux Pinfire Revolver (essential equipment for sensible gentlewomen everywhere) and coolly aimed and fired thrice, placing three most satisfying bullet holes in the rear panels of his car. Three shots were quite sufficient, there was no need to show off,

In the aftermath there was no difficulty as when I presented my Intrepidness Card to the young policewoman attending the incident I was of course absolved of all blame. However I did receive warning that I was improperly dressed, but once I explained that I was between hats as it were I was informed that so long as I could produce a cloche hat to be sighted by the desk sergeant within 48hrs no more would be said about it. Intrepidness is afterall a grave responsibility.
As to the young man he was dragged away in chains to break rocks in the hot sun which jolly well serves him right.

(I should mention that as a younger woman I was a keen role player and in the aftermath of upsetting incidents a good bit of vivid and imaginative role play within one's own mind can greatly help to restore one's sense of calm)
Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy chocolate which is almost the same thing
Home of the Kotanga Tramway.

Last edited by Intrepid Wheelwoman; 01-30-2014 at 03:02 AM.
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